Tag archives: expectations

Adolescence ends when you finally admit you still need your parents Bookmark and Share

Psychologists say that increased fighting between adolescents and parents is part of a natural process of a child breaking away and becoming independent. But has anyone else had an adolescence that extended 25 years?

Yep, instead of a few years of being a teenage bitch, I spent more than two decades trying to separate myself from my parents. At the age of 26, I moved 1,000 miles away from my childhood home just to get some distance. It didn’t seem like that was the reason at the time—I was merely starting a fun new life with my ...

Continue reading

This time my mother's visit won't cause anxiety Bookmark and Share

My mom is coming to visit in two days. I can’t wait, and it’s not just because I’m two weeks into this three-week single parenthood stint and I desperately need reinforcements.

It’s because for the first time in years, I feel like I will be myself this visit. I’ve lived in another state for 13 years now, and every visit has caused me at least mild anxiety. Some visits have caused a lot of anxiety.

Take the Christmas when my entire family drove out and I turned into Martha Stewart. I decked the halls. I ...

Continue reading

Giving up the teenage dream Bookmark and Share

At 17, I planned out my entire life until age 30: a college degree and marriage by 22 followed by two children (girl then boy), a master’s degree and a fulfilling professional career by 30. My plans didn’t go beyond that, so apparently I was going to drop dead or go insane after that crazy journey.

This plan made perfect sense in my naïve mind. I was already engaged (feel free to roll your eyes, I always do when I think of it) and had begun freshman year of college. Fortunately, it didn’t pan out. Instead college ...

Continue reading

My power struggle with work and how I finally won Bookmark and Share

For Christmas my boss gave me a copy of the book he’s been reading, “Crossing the Unknown Sea: Work as a Pilgrimage of Identity.” I feel it both ironic and mildly amusing that the book now sits on my nightstand next to one I’ve been reading, “When Work Doesn’t Work Anymore: Women, Work and Identity.”

Work and identity—for me an almost impossible puzzle to figure out. You see, I started working at age 14 and my job soon became a place of refuge. At my job, I could be a superstar. I was noticed. I was ...

Continue reading

Expectations in the Windy City Bookmark and Share

Expectations in the Windy City

Next weekend my husband, daughter and I head to Chicago, one of my favorite places on earth. I love the noises of the city and the way it vibrates with energy. I live in a fairly decent sized metro area, Denver, but for a small-town girl who converted to urbanism the first time she lived in a city, it’s just not the same.

Our trip got me thinking about our last trip there, three years ago. My daughter was a year and a half and we combined the journey with going to Wisconsin to visit my family, attend two ...

Continue reading