The problem with self-awareness is that you start to notice areas where you’re out of balance. I’ve always been a “doer,” constantly in motion—the I’ll-sleep-when-I’m-dead-kind-of-person.
Yet, I often find myself wondering where time went. And even though I’m enjoying lots of fun things in the moment, I don’t take the time to reflect and process them. I don’t think I’m the only one. Being busy is the new black apparently. We’re all caught up in the rush of doing things instead of being someone.
Since having a child I’ve realized that though I was busy before, I still had those lazy Sundays of reading and napping the afternoon away. It kept me balanced. Now those lazy Sundays are gone and I’m all out of whack. Yet, I keep scheduling things. I’m beginning to relate to John Lennon’s quote from “Beautiful Boy:” “Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.”
Variations of that message surround me lately. During a recent yoga class the instructor talked about how we live in a culture that values the part of us that is in motion, but it’s just as important to be still. Ying and yang. Maybe the universe really is trying to tell me something, and I think it’s “slow, the hell down.”
I am lucky to have a pretty marvelous life, but so often I’m too exhausted to notice. But maybe, the slow-it-down message is slowly seeping in. Every once in awhile my need “to be” overpowers my urge “to do." Last night I was asleep on the couch at 7 pm and I slept until 7:30 this morning. It may have been the red wine, antihistamine cocktail I had for dinner, but I'm going to call that one learning to simply "be."